We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
