Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
