Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I have already put on my inside pants.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
