the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He told me they were just razor bumps!
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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