And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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