So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
