He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...