Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
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How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
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are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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