two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
