see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize