They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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