One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
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