If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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