This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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