I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
