I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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