saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
