So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
