we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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