the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
