my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
