i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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