Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
