I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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