you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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