I have demons in me.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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