I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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