so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
