Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize