A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
