My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Even my vagina gasped.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
