im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I need to align my fucking chakras
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
