your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Randomize
