Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
