So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
