You're a womanizer and a bitch.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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