I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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