I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
And then my night got REAL pukey
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
