May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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