i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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