i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I think my vagina is haunted
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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