I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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