it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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