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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
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