do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
