I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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