Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
