Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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