Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
