Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize