i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
