some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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