Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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